You are More

It seems like eternity since I last penned down my thoughts. There has been countless times where things on my mind have warranted me to sit and write, yet I've never done so. You may ask why, but I honestly have no answer in response. This post will lead you to nothing new in my life, no updated experiences, but instead, a realization.

I, Danual Lee Moon, am worthless. I am a constant failure that never does anything right. I ruin the most wonderful relationships. I am unlovable. People don't like me. I am good at nothing. I have no friends. I'm not good enough. I can't sing. I want to change my life. I don't trust. I've been hurt. I am hurt. I'm skinny. I am worth no one's time. I am a burden. I'm emotional. I'm closed-in. I'm boring. I'm stupid. I'm nostalgic. I deserve nothing. I am ugly.

The list can, and does go on. Negative, are they not? They are, however, the thoughts I hold about myself. I am self conscious, to say the least. Past experiences, and even things of this year, seem to be my support to this reasoning. If you ask me "what are things you like about yourself?", I seem to stumble as if my legs we're tied together and I was told to run 100 meters. It's a Herculean feat for me to think of my positives. Why? Because I feel like I have none. (This is not a pity post, hence the word "realization.") My response to compliments are often times laughs, because I do not know how to take them. They are opposite of what I see myself as. The few that know me and my low-self concept try to convince me otherwise. It is indeed a formidable foe for me.

Amidst a late night conversation with a friend though, the subject was breached. It was the iceberg to my Titanic. Beginning the sinking process of the SS "Self-Worthlessness". Where it began to sink, quite expeditious I might add, was sitting in front of a mirror at the gym. A bench in a corner, where nobody was, called my name, therefore enabling me to do my shoulder press alone. In the intermissions between sets, I sat there, looking at myself in the mirror, thinking. However, only one thing repeated through my mind.

"For You created my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother's womb. I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are your works, and my soul knows very well" - Psalm 139: 14

Constantly in life, my heart battled my mind. My mind telling me I'm not good enough, my heart saying that there's One who loves me more than I can fathom. My mind stood triumphant over, what seemed, a disheartened and weary competitor. All day today, I could not relieve my mind of this subject. And my heart began to take a stand for himself.

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we may walk in them" - Ephesians 2:10

The mindset, onerous as it may be, is one I'm striving to trump. Let my ship sink, no need to throw a life-line for this one. I know I'm not a perfect person, but I know that God made me perfectly in His image (Genesis 1:27). I find confidence in that fact, God loves me because He made me. So I am going to actively pursue a mindset that agrees with my heartset. Love me because God loves me. Though I may still have my demons, my downfalls, and my nostalgia, I face them with the notion that I am who God made me to be. This song came on my shuffle today (coincidence, eh?), and I thought I'd share. I am more than the mistakes I've made.

This therefore leads me to the same subject (ish?), different topic. Not me, but you, or rather, us. Thirty minutes into my poli-sci discussion last week we talked about beauty for a few minutes. What is beauty? The outward facade our society throws us: airbrushed and computer enhanced models for women and muscular, six pack, huge pectorals and biceps for the men. And we are sucked in like bears to honey.

Why are we so okay with being downgraded, defined, and deemed "ugly" by people whose opinions don't even matter? Remember, they are just opinions. We ignore people's opinion on music, on books, and the like, but why not their definition of beauty?

There could never be a more beautiful you. And I mean it. You are perfectly beautiful just the way you are. And the men (or women) who deem you the opposite are unworthy of you. It absolutely breaks my heart to see girls torn apart by our society, by boys, because they aren't "good enough." Psalm 45:11 says, "The King is enthralled by your beauty". Why then do we fall into the lies, the deception, that this vanishing world throws toward us? If the Maker and Creator is enthralled by our beauty, then why do mere men and women matter? They don't.

Dear reader,

I'm telling you with every inch of passion in me that you are beautiful. Gorgeous. Charming. Delightful. Graceful. Radiant. Stunning. (OR) handsome, good-looking, well-formed, superb. Let nobody tell you otherwise. For who are they to judge what is beauty? Don't form to the world, their view of beauty is fleeting, as is everything in this world. There is one man (or lady) who finds you as precious as silver, and will love you for who you are. There is one God who finds you beautiful beyond compare. And I for one am telling you that you are. God loves your beauty how it is. Even more so, beauty "should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyle sand the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (1 Peter 3:3-5). Focus your heart on what matters, but know there can NEVER be a more beautiful you.

With love,

Dan

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Alligator Sky

So here I go typing out the second blog I promised you. This post is unaimed. Filled with random points, to say the least. My mind is being given free reign to spill everything it has contained up in there. It's scattered ideas are going to be much like the sporadic flight patterns of bees. And so it will buzz here, and buzz there. But you'll catch the drift of the multitude of things I'll be talking about.

Alligator Sky? You're like, what? And well, if you haven't caught on yet, I'll tell ya. Every post I write is a song title. And I chose this specific one for my Spring post for no other reason than the lines that Adam Young sing that say: "Even though I'll never know what's up ahead, I'm never letting go. I'm never letting go!" I thought it was a great way to just think about spring. The bright beauty of everything springing back to life after hiding themselves away in the cold winter and the unidentified things that will come. Everyday I wonder what God has for me. What is to come today, tomorrow, and the day after. But just because we don't know what's coming, there's no reason to give up. I love the song itself, Adam is just basically saying the sky's the limit. Telling us to reach for the stars and let our imagination grow. This alligator sky is the idea that days will be frightening (like alligators!) and hard at times, but we need to keep pressing and blasting into them like a rocket with every inch of determination in us. Theme song for my spring? I think so.

Well I started off Spring at the Melanson's house and I can't think of a better place to have done so. I returned from El Sal at LAX and was generously given the opportunity to spend the weekend with them. I absolutely love spending time with Sami and her family, and oh how I adore them. Two or three days is never, ever enough. It's always so encouraging to be around the Melanson family, and always filled with laughter. Their heart for the Lord is so refreshing and I admire it very much. They are so much like family to me! I always wish I could spend more time. Mr. and Mrs. Melanson are so incredibly generous and caring, and I'm happy to be blessed with them in my life. Special thanks to you Mrs. Melanson for your endearment and investment in my life. Jess is like a little sister to me :) and the boys like younger bros. One of the things I love, and is a reoccurring enjoyment at their house is, worship. I love the fact that they have like every instrument readily available for my hands. But to pick up the guitar and sing worship with Sam, Jess, and the family is incredible. Not to mention Jess and Sami have unbelievably wonderful voices. Oh how I love to sing worship with them. Also, this time around, it was very comforting to hear Mr. Melanson's past and how it so closely relates to mine. And along with that, to be uplifted with words of encouragement from him. It was good to hear advice from a godly man like him.

Sami is without a doubt, one of my best friends, and I delight in spending time with her. That weekend, we spent one of the nights talking for almost three hours about life and such, and it was incredibly uplifting. Our pasts seem to intertwine so easily, and it's wonderful to be able to relate, be encouraged, and to encourage. I'm so glad to have her in my life, and I couldn't ask for more. Charles Kingsley stated:

"A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend; one human soul whom we can trust utterly; who knows the best and the worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults; who will speak the honest truth to us, while the world flatters us to our face, and laughs at us behind our back."

So thank you Samantha for being you. I'm glad that you're so trustworthy, caring, and always there when I need you. I'm so incredibly blessed to have you in my life, and to be able to call you my best friend. :) thanks.

Time for the bee to buzz to the next idea:

This quarter is almost an exact replica of the last quarter in terms of classes. I'm taking a Poli Sci, an Economics, a Humanities and a Music class. I don't think it's any easier either, in fact, I believe this quarter is going to be more difficult in terms of work load, which DEFINITELY means I can't slack. But nonetheless I'm more excited about it than last, because the subjects of each class are more interesting. I've also being working harder and diligently at digging into the word daily. It's so refreshing to start (or end) the day with the Word. Ephesians 1:17-18 says:

"I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you."

I desire to know Him more, and draw closer to Him. Paul's prayer for the Ephesians is a prayer for everybody, that we all come to know Him and our hearts opened to the hope we have in Him. And by doing so, daily getting into God's word is what strengthens our hearts, and our relationship with God. So I've been getting into Acts, and to see the disciples devotion to spreading the Gospel is amazing, and encouraging in my daily life. So I'm going to try to continually be in the word, for in Deuteronomy 8:3 it says: "man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God."

I've also had the desire to start reading more Christian books. I'm not a reader at all, but I feel like books are vital, aside from the Bible, to our walk. So I've come up with a list of books I want to try to get to read before Summer, and even into summer.

1. (Finish) Doctrine by Mark Driscoll

2. Reason for God by Tim Keller

3. Crazy Love by Francis Chan

4. Vintage Jesus by Mark Driscoll

5. Fifty Reasons Why Jesus Came to Die - John Piper

6. Heaven by Randy Alcorn

I heard these were all very good books, and if you have any suggestions on books, I would love to hear them! So let me know! I'm excited to read these.

A quick side note on the quarter, I've realized that I'm running out of dining dollars, and money, and I still have ten weeks to go. I'm definitely worried, but trusting in God. I like to eat a lot, and obviously I need to. If anyone would love to send a "food-package" or gift card to grocery store, I would absolutely be so blessed. But prayer would be so greatly appreciated :)

This also gets me on the track of what I am to do for summer. I've yet to hear back from Hume Lake (it should be any day now), and I've been having my doubts. I don't know if I can be away from home and friends for 3 months, then come straight back to school next year. Also, Summer Project was really put on my heart when I was in El Salvador (Summer Project is a 6-week 'project' of ministry) in El Salvador. However, that has been something I've had to question as well because I need to work this summer to make money for next year. So I thought of the summer project in Santa Monica, CA instead. Fourth option would of course be going back home to San Luis for all of summer, and trying to find work there. All this is flustering my mind, so I pray, and I'll ask you to pray, that God really works in my heart, and opens and shuts doors to where He sees fit.

My last bit of writing is a question I've been asking God a lot lately. That is, in first person view, and to be vague without giving it away, is, "Why God, do you put a feeling on my heart, that I don't know why is there?" It's a feeling that I can't seem to escape, that I pray about, but I feel God has given reasons to why it stays there, and why I can't escape it. If you want more details, I implore you to ask me. But its intriguing, that sometimes God puts things on our hearts that we have no idea why they are there.

But if you have stuck with me this far, I'm impressed, and I thank you.

With another post coming soon. I sign out.

With love,

Dan

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Be Longing Always

Howdy.
Here comes the first of the few posts I'm going to pour out.

So let us dive into this.

As I prepped you in the last post,

the words that lay across this specific post are all El Sal,

God works on our hearts in amazing ways.

Well,

Up until the day I left (and the post I wrote) I didn't think much on the trip. Excited as I was, I wasn't consumed by what the trip entailed until I was sitting in LAX. Mentally preparing myself for this foreign "world" it would almost seem, my heart began to beat with expeditious speed.

Like a gazelle initiating its "flight" mode when face to face with the lion. I began to really start to grasp what this week would be. I longed for San Luis Obispo, family, and friends, and instead I was flying to El Salvador, to spend a week with people I don't know in an unfamiliar land (man, what the Israelites must have felt when they were wandering!). But sitting on the floor I told myself "Enough of ME!" and began to think of all that God could use me for, and it seemed almost immediately the Holy Spirt engulfed me and calmed my rattled heart. Removing my-selfish-self fromthis picture, and put to the forefront of my mind the people of El Salvador I would be having a chance to impact. And this "letting-myself-go" really did work for the good.

Saturday: It was the first day and we arrived in El Sal around 6 am (plane left at 11:45 pm, hour difference, and a 5 hour flight) so we decided to head out to breakfast before hitting the hotel. On the way to breakfast the Mini-bus broke down. Seemed like a good start, eh? It turned out well though, most of us were tired anyways. The rest of the day we just pretty much slept around the hotel.

Sunday: The one 'vacation' day of the trip. Beach day! We drove like 45 minutes towards the coast, Pacific Ocean side. Weather was absolutely beautiful, somewhere between 84-88, as a rough guesstimate. Couldn't think of a more perfect beach day. Well, after a few minutes of getting situated, I booked it towards the ocean. I was eager to feel the difference between Avila/La Jolla vs. El Sal ocean. Long strides brought me closer and closer, the last few strides bringing my legs hurling towards the water. As my feet broke the plane between air and water, a feeling of amazement overtook me. The water was so incredibly warm, yet so incredibly refreshing. It was just so incredibly awesome. Emphasis on incredibly, and AWE. The rest of the day involved swimming, laying and swaying in a hammock, drinking an El Salvador smoothie de Sandia, aka watermelon smoothie. Totally tropical. Totally wonderful.

Then to top it off we went to a Pupusaria, a place that specialized in pupusas. What are pupusas? click the word. :)

Monday: This was when the missions part of 'mission's trip' came alive. The most incredible part was that it's almost an exact replica of what I can, and should be doing here at SD. We went onto the college campus Evangelica, and went sharing. I was with Amy and Veekee (a native Salvadorian) Thank God for Veekee who was there to help me when I was blanking on Spanish. Spending time with students, doing solarium, and just sharing about our faith was incredible. It was surprising to hear that most all the students we talked to had some knowledge, or background of God and church in their lives, but didn't know what distinguished that between having a relationship with our great Savior. It was cool explaining that, and inviting them to Vida Estudiantil, an on-campus bible study that was just starting up. I don't know how my words impacted them, but God does. I'm faithful that God will move in those people because of the seed I could have planted. One of the more encouraging things that happened this day, was after each sharing, we asked to pray for them, and then we prayed. Most all of them asked us to pray for "family and studies" but nonetheless, laying hands on students and praying for them was incredible. Prayers in two languages to One Great God was just absolutely moving.

Tuesday and Wednesday: Since Obama decided to come to El Salvador the same week we did, students had no school on these days (just for Obama, how lucky!). Because of this, we didn't get to go on campus, well, I should say, we had no one to share with. So instead we had two service projects.

The first of which incredibly broke my heart, but encouraged me nonetheless. We went to an orphanage and spent the day there. There were young boys, young girls, teenage girls (abused, raped, with child...even a pregnant 12-year old) and the mentally challenged and handicapped kids. We got to go and show God's love to these boys and girls who had to deal with so much, without even being that old. I spend my entire time in the handicapped area. The area that most wouldn't choose when there were 'normal' kids you could choose instead. I fell in love with a young boy named Lionel. He was maybe about a year old, or somewhere around there. He didn't walk yet. My guess so his disability was down syndrome, yet he didn't have the typical face, and because I'm not a doctor, I can't tell you what was wrong. I held him for almost two hours, before he wanted to crawl around. But I couldn't leave him (and he wouldn't let me, every time I handed him to someone else, he'd cry) but he was just so cute, and I tried pouring out every ounce of all my love on him. I didn't care that my arm was getting tired from making him fly, hanging him upside down, and throwing him up in the air. The smile and the laugh just captured me. I did get to spend some time with other kids in the area as well. One boy (shown below) would always run up to me, hug and jump on me, smile, and I couldn't not enjoy it. Though his hand was covered in saliva, I didn't care. The joy I could sense in him overwhelmed any selfishness in me. There was also another boy, who, also pictured below (the baby), I spent some time with. Heart-wrenching story, was that, when he was born, he was a perfectly normal baby, but one night his father drunk and raging, through him against the wall, and when they took him to the hospital, the mother lied and said he fell, and then the next day the father did it again, and it permanently damaged the kid. Though I can't tell the story as moving as the carers, I was close to tears. The kid, having suffered so much already, almost never stopped smiling and wanting to cuddle up with you. Under the pictures I post some thoughts that I talked about at Crusade the other night, just what God taught me this day:

So these are the thoughts on the Orphanage. Take what you can from it.

- Picture of God’s love (how they love you without even knowing you) compared to God’s love when he knows ALL about you.

o God loves you the way you are, but refuses to leave you that way. He wants you to be just like Jesus

o 1 Thessalonians 5:23 Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely; and may your whole spirit, soul, and body be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

- The impact we have in LOVING others. The affect that that has. Jesus did the same thing. He came to love.

o Love is sacrifice; Love it thinking about others before thinking about yourself. Selfless, not selfish.

o Lay down your life for another. Even your enemies.

o Can’t get clearer than Romans 5:8. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

- Now what?

o As Christians, we are called to leadership, to lead a lost world to salvation. How then can we not be prompted to action? We have the key to eternity, through our knowledge of Jesus Christ and so how can we standby while those around us die without Christ? Where is the love in that?

o Romans 10:14-17 "How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without something preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"

The second service project, on Wednesday, was we painted an elementary school. There's not much really to talk about, since we painted all day, but it was great to just serve a neighborhood school with a new look. And boy was I boss at painting.

Thursday: Our last "official" day in El Sal, was once again a sharing day. We went onto Evangelica again, and just shared with students we came across. But it was different this time around because we shared our testimonies, and for those of you who know mine, it's always hard for me. (if you don't, I encourage you to ask me, I would love to share). But people were so open and loving to me in the midst of my sharing. It was great to hear about peoples' lives in another country and be able to share mine, while tying the Gospel and the good news of Jesus in with it. The downside of the day was I was getting a bit sick from something I ate or drank, but I pushed through it (for a while). That night all the guys pushed our beds together (5 of them) to make the PANGEA bed, in which like 15 guys slept on. Interesting, to say the least.

There is SO much I'm probably forgetting that I'll add in a later post.

But nonetheless, I am so thankful to have been blessed with the opportunity to go on this trip.

I can't think of anything I would have rather done during Spring break. God called me out, and instead of making excuses, and accompanying my selfish side, I listened. So glad I did.

This is not one of those posts where I am to reveal a huge "realization" or something of that sort. Just want YOU to have a glimpse of what I did, and if you ever have the urge to go on a missions trip, I can encourage you and say YES DO IT.

Hope you enjoyed reading this monster of a post.

In all thankfulness for your care,

Danual

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Skeleton Bones

So you're probably reading this, ready to hear all about El Salvador.

And the ways the God worked in and through me.

But you won't get that

However, it's coming. I promise!

This is just one of those posts that say, HEY. I'm still here.

I'm alive. Breathing. Moving. And I will update you.

Just in case you were worried. Ha!

I'll be writing in the next few days (actually quite a few!).

Posts you can be looking forward to:

Be Longing Always

The trip to El Sal. The amazing way God works. And all that jazz.

Alligator Sky

It's Spring! Everything is becoming beautiful. What spring looks like, and my New-Spring-Resolution. Or at least, what I hope to do during this wonderful season.

So definitely be looking for these in the next few days. I'm excited to sit down and write.

It's been so long.

I love to do it and it's always ridiculously ridiculous that I don't have time.

Time just isn't my friend. But is it anybody's?

Anyways, hope all is going well.

With prayer and petition,

Dan

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Go Hard

So, I'm writing, when I probably shouldn't be.

It's finals week this week, therefore I should be cramming my face into the books.

But I've been doing that all day, so I think I deserve a break.

I really don't like finals, but who does?

No one in their right mind would.

It is such a waste of time, spending hours and hours for a huge difficult test in which our lives (grade) depends on. Ugh.

First thing on my mind.

I've been thinking how interesting it is that my last name is Moon.

It's weird to think that I take the last name of father who had no hand in my life.

Don't get me wrong, I love him with all my heart.

I just question how fair that is, say, to my mom (I love you!).

Who raised me single-handedly for my life.

So why is my last name Moon, and not Hall. Interesting, eh?

To lighten up the mood,

I'm counting down the days. I can barely even focus on finals.

5 days until I leave for San Salvador, El Salvador.

God has blessed me so immensely with the opportunity to go on this trip.

It's amazing that God allows opportunities like this in our lives,

where he uses us to reach out to others.

It's absolutely incredible to think that God would use ME to reach out to others.

I am a mere sinner (Romans 3:23), yet he uses me to love others and glorify Him.

It blows my mind when I truly sit and think about it.

What have I done to deserve to show His glory, yet alone deserve his grace and love.

I am a constant failure, but yet His love never ceases.

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases,

His mercies never come to an end.

They are new every morning;

Great is Your faithfulness." - Lamentations 3:22-24

No matter how many times I fall on my face, the Lord looks at me with compassion,

Much like a doe's patience with her fawn's inability to stand.

Lovingly He encourages me to continue to stand and try again.

And while trying to stand, He encourages me to jump into El Salvador,

and share the Gospel.

Amazing.

The Lord's grace, love, and care tells me though I fall short, there is power found in the Cross.

"For I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" - Philippians 4:13

And now, in the midst of studying my mind to bits,

I am finding strength in God. He knows why He has me going to El Salvador,

And I am anxiously excited to see how the Lord will USE me.

The title of the post, Go Hard, is a song by Lecrae, in which he says:

"Go hard, or go home. Lord use me up"

I want to go hard for Him, and I want Him to use me up.

I can't wait to see how He does in the coming trip.

Nervously pumped. That's my emotion.

Why nervous?

I am leaving the familiar boundaries of my just-getting-accustomed-to college,

and instead of going home for Spring Break,

I'm going into a foreign country, foreign language, and culture.

And I will be sharing, what may be, foreign knowledge; the Gospel.

"How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without something preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!"

- Romans 10:14-17

It's astonishing to read that and not be moved.

That there are people who don't even know they can call out to the wonderful counselor we call Abba Father.

It saddens me, but at the same time, I personally,

don't feel my life-calling being that of a foreign missionary.

However, that doesn't prevent me from being a missionary in my daily life here on college.

And especially, on this trip.

I love the end of the Romans verse, taken from Isaiah 52:7.

The Lord says the feet of those who bring good news are beautiful.

Lecrae, yes again, has a song called Beautiful Feet, in which he says,

"Go, go, go, run with those beautiful feet

Go, go, go

You hold the truth that saves, so run and shout it to the world

They can't believe in something they ain't never heard."

So, I am going to GO HARD with my BEAUTIFUL FEET

Shouting to El Salvadorians the wonderful news of Jesus Christ.

I am excited. I am nervous. I am so blessed.

I would absolutely love if you could pray for me,

Pray that I can encourage. Pray that I grow in Him.

Pray that I do go hard. Pray that he uses me up.

Pray that this trip brings light to a world of darkness. (John 3:18-20!)

My encouragement for you, as I'm encouraged by these verses,

and the opportunity to travel to another country,

is that just because you aren't "on" a missions trip, doesn't mean you aren't in a mission.

The word of God calls us:

To be lights (1 Thess. 5:5)

To glorify Him (1 Chronicles 16:29)

and to share the Gospel (Mark 16:15-16)

To stick with Lecrae for the entirety of the post,

I'll leave you with this, what a heavenly mindset, one that I try to think daily.

"And you can have the money

And you can have the fame

But me I want the Glory

I'm living for the Name

See life is just a picture

I see outside the frame

I'm livin for a Kingdom that I ain't never seen"

Chase that Glory.

Chase God.

Live for Him.

With much love,

Danual

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Silhouettes

So, its 1:10 am, Saturday night.

Or is it Sunday morning?

I think its still Saturday night because I haven't gone to sleep.

So first, you should definitely listen to the song of this post

(If you don't realize, every post title is a song title)

It's by Swimming with Dolphins.

And I've listened to it probably over a hundred times in the last few months.

The entire song is just brilliant.

From the instrumentation to the lyricism.

But what always stands out to me, every time I listen, is:

"Who really needs the past, with the allure of something new"

The ghosts of my past seem to constantly haunt me.

Regrets and Nostalgia, two shadows that trail behind.

I can never seem to shake them. No matter where I run and what corners I turn.

They're often times allies in a plot to keep me up for hours at night.

But now I seem to have a weapon at my disposal.

One to ward them off.

That is, the allure of something new. :)

I know not of what will come tomorrow, but there has got to be something new.

Something that will grab me, something I will enjoy, somewhere.

That is what I look to, and what I have been lately.

Dear reader. Keep your head up, in the midst of toughness, or complete joy.

There's always something new and wonderful God has in store for you.

And another note, I just finished watching Prince of Persia,

and have a new actress crush to add the list of 7 (why 7? because its my favorite number),

and she sure did rise above most of those who have been on it for a while.

1. As you already know, Zooey Deschanel

2. The new addition, Gemma Arterton. She is so gorgeous, it's unbelievable.

3. The ever so stunning Rachel McAdams

4. The gorgeous, blonde, Scarlett Johansson

5. The angelic and lovely, Kiera Knightley

6. The beautiful, (except for the first name), Olga Kurylenko

7. And the magically magnificent, Emma Watson

Those are my top 7 ACTRESSES.

Therefore you should already know Taylor Swift would trump any of them,

but I'm just talking about actress crushes here.

(being in one movie, Valentine's Day, doesn't make her an actress)

But I've got to say, Gemma is absolutely enchanting.

I couldn't get over how tantalizing she was.

Couldn't keep my eyes off of her the entire movie. Ha.

Well.

It's 8th week, incredible. Which means this week, and the next,

are my last two weeks of classes, then finals.

It has seemingly gone by so fast, yet SO slow at the same time.

I'm not caught up, and really dreading finals are coming.

So prayer would be greatly appreciated.

It's my last IM outdoor soccer game tomorrow, it sucks that outdoor rec soccer is over.

And, also, in three weeks (after finals) I head off to San Salvador, El Salvador!

You don't know how excited, and nervous, I am about this trip.

I'll probably write a post soon (I promise) on El Salvador, and my excitement.

Anyways, hope all is well with you.

It is going well with me.

With love,

Dan

PS: Isn't she just splendid?

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Folding Chair

"Just because everything's changing

Doesn't mean it's never been this way before."

-The Call

I have been listening to Regina Spektor quite a bit lately.

Enjoying every bit of it.

Her music makes me smile.

I always wish I had more time to scribble out all my thoughts and life.

But I mean, who can really do that anyways? ALL their thoughts?

To do that you would need thousands upon thousands of sheets of paper.

Thousands upon thousands of ounces of ink.

Do not forget time. You'd need lots of it as well.

All of which I don't have.

So, here I sit, ready to compose what I can at this moment.

I admire the quote shown above.

Everything's changing. I can barely keep up with how often I find myself

catching up with readings. studying for midterms. writing papers.

There's no set schedule in my life.

It's sporadic. It's hectic. It's energetic.

I want a break. And you may think it's here, three-day weekend, right?

Ah. Tis not a break, I'm accompanied with more catching up to do.

It's as if its unending. I just want to sit back and take a breath.

But there's nothing I want to, or can, give up in my schedule.

School, studying, working out, worship/bible study/church, voice lessons.

So I'll keep praying for a breather in my life soon.

I've been getting stressed, and upset.

I hate change. I want everything to go smoothly, perfectly, how I want it.

But then I realize, that isn't life. That's romanticism.

And this romanticism, therefore, boosts my selfishness.

My life becomes centered around what I want and when I want, and not around God.

I tend to forget that there is no such thing as a "Jesus Jack."

I can't take him out of the trunk when my car hits trouble.

But neither can I form the idea to "give Him the keys to the car," why?

Because it implies that I must give Him permission, must give Him control.

See the thing is, God is in COMPLETE control. He does what he wants.

I don't need to acknowledge it for it to be true.

I am not implying that we don't need to acknowledge Him though.

For when we do, we realize that He is in control, and He knows what He's doing.

He knows everything and His plan and purpose will ultimately prevail.

So, we can...

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart

and lean not on your own understanding;

in all your ways submit to Him,

and He will direct your paths." - Proverbs 3:5-6

I hate how selfish I am, and how it clouds my mind.

But I believe in circumstances, in the midst of change, we must look at it with the right view.

If we look upon it as burdensome and negative, then the clouds will gather, and hide the sun.

But, when we see that it's God working in our lives (Romans 8:28), the son gets brighter.

Circumstances get smaller as God gets greater.

I urge you, to request that God would do whatever He needs to, in and through your life,

for His will to be done, and His kingdom advance. Not yours.

When we focus on the mindset that this life is ours,

we allow every wrong turn and every heart-wrenching moment to control our emotion.

But when we abandon that, and desire that He be glorified in and through our lives,

we have a hope to cling on to when the waters ride tough.

For we know, that the living God is our God. And He says:

"I know the plans I have for you...Plans to give you hope and a future" - Jeremiah 29:11

Therefore, I plead with you, as I plead with myself,

to drop our self-centered me, me, me look on every situation,

and acknowledge it in the hands of an almighty, wonderful, powerful, and loving God.

I know how hard life can be, I have struggled much lately.

But upon writing this to you, I write to myself.

I pen this out addressed to my heart, while typing it to you as well.

Life can't continually go our way, but it goes God's way.

It is not a life of perfection, but a life of fighting.

We must endure the tough, the saddening, and the heart-breaking,

For we know He is with us.

For in his arms we find peace. shelter. love.

In the arms of our Savior.

With love and prayers,

Danual.

All the way my Savior leads me

Who have I to ask beside

How could I doubt His tender mercy

Who through life has been my guide

All the way my Savior leads me

Cheers each winding path I tread

Gives me grace for every trial

Feeds me with the living Bread

You lead me and keep me from falling

You carry me close to Your heart

And surely Your goodness and mercy will follow me

All the way my Savior leads me

O, the fullness of His love

O, the sureness of His promise

In the triumph of His blood

And when my spirit clothed immortal

Wings its flight to realms of day

This my song through endless ages

Jesus led me all the way

Jesus led me all the way

All the way my Savior leads me

All the way my Savior leads me

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